"Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true."--Robert Brault

January: Nutrition and Health
February: Kindness and Generosity
March: Order and Purpose
April: Strength and Flexibility
May: Relationships
June: Adventure and Fun
July: Community and Environment
August: Knowledge and Interests
September: Sleep and Tranquility
October: Simplicity and Moderation
November: Gratitude and Positivity
December: Spirituality and Resolution

I believe that out of every month I’ve planned, February’s goal is by far the most important. If the news is any indication of reality, we live in a world full of hatred, violence, stress and greed. Just imagine how beautiful and peaceful our lives would be if every person, every day attempted to be kinder and more generous to one another! Don't get me wrong, I don’t wake up each morning with the soul of Mother Teresa. I can be spiteful and selfish at times, and even my sense of humor often relies on sarcasm and teasing. I know that I have a good heart and good intentions, but if I died tomorrow, I’m not sure I would be satisfied with the way I treated everyone around me. I plan to spend February changing my habits so that what I think, what I say, and what I do brings happiness to other people.

This month, I plan to give as many compliments, words of encouragement, cheerful greetings, and generous gestures as I can to friends, family, students, co-workers, and strangers.

“I can live for two months on a good compliment."--Mark Twain. As wonderful as it is to give compliments, I’ve never been that great at it. Yes, I’ll tell someone that I like their shoes or that their new haircut looks great, but I think there is an art to giving memorable, genuine compliments. I need to change my mindset so that I’m always looking for the positive, and I need to be sincere, caring and particular about my words. I have a friend that has mastered the art of giving compliments. Instead of carelessly saying, “Cute shirt,” like I would, her eyes light up and she excitedly says, “That shirt is so flattering on you! You look fantastic. It really brings out the green in your eyes. Where did you get it?” This is obviously a great friend for my ego, but I could also learn a thing or two from her approach.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."--Plato. As a high school teacher, being kind and encouraging is especially important because every day I have the opportunity to influence the lives of my students. Many come from poverty, broken or abusive homes, or at least with the usual teenage angst, which can be hard to remember when I have a job to do. There is always that student who is absent all the time, is never prepared, and has a weird hair color and bad attitude. It would be easy for me to point out everything he/she is doing wrong, but usually this is the type of student who needs a boost of confidence the most, and the real test is in finding a way to let them know I’m proud of them. I don’t remember a lot of things I learned in school, but I do remember which teachers were nice and which teachers were mean. If my students don’t remember the plot of Hamlet or how to write a synthesis essay, my hope is that they at least remember that I cared about them.

"Treat everyone with politeness, even those who are rude to you - not because they are nice, but because you are."--Anonymous. This is easier said than done, but I am going to work on being positive and cheerful to people even when they don’t quite deserve it. There was an NPR article online the other day about a man who was mugged in NYC this winter. As the young criminal, dressed in a T-shirt, was running away with his wallet, the man offered him his coat. Surprised by the man’s kindness, the kid ended up giving him his wallet back and joining him for dinner. I thought this was an inspiring story because if this guy could be kind to his mugger, surely I can be kind when my husband leaves his clothes around the house or a stranger takes my parking spot. I’ve tried nagging, complaining, pouting, and rolling my eyes, yet none of those tactics seem to get me anywhere. I guess I'll see if it really works to kill them with kindness.

"The best portion of a good man's life - his little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love."--William Wordsworth. A few years ago I was at the grocery store and unsuccessfully carrying several bags of food to my car while in a leg cast and on crutches. The task was going to be difficult, to say the least, until a woman and her two young daughters asked if they could help. I was not only grateful, but I thought it was a wonderful lesson on kindness that the mother was teaching her girls. It’s easy to go through everyday life living in our own little bubble, but all around us are situations where a person's day, or even life, could be turned around by one compassionate and generous gesture.

Actions speak louder than words, so time for me to get out there and start being nicer to people!

"Happiness is not a matter of intensity but of balance, order, rhythm and harmony."

With January being devoted to nutrition and health, I started the week by clearing out my fridge and stocking up at the whole foods store. The first week of my new lifestyle was a success, but then the weekend came with its many temptations and a lack of routine, and I found myself shamefully eating whatever I wanted and letting my goals fly out the window. I was worried my resolutions might not be taken seriously if I was seen scarfing down a basket of garlic bread and a plate of lasagna, but I reassured myself that part of the plan was to quit dieting and indulge a little. So why did I still feel ashamed? Can't I be healthy and do this too? The more I thought about it, the more I realized that I’ve spent years being burdened by guilt and unrealistic expectations when it comes to nutrition and health. No matter how much exercising, raw food, and health books I incorporated into my life, I always felt like I should be doing more. (I feel bad for not flossing...is that normal?!)

Since this entire project is about being a better, happier person, I know that it is time to figure out the root of these feelings and to change this destructive mindset. The constant exposure to different diet fads, supplements, gym memberships, health trends, and beautiful people in the media adds a lot of pressure, but the time has come for me to give up on the idealistic notion that I will someday be a vegan or have six-pack abs and to start being realistic. At one point I taught aerobics, at one point I lived on the beach, and at one point I was 20, but I will spend the rest of my life being unhappy if I expect to always look and feel the same as I did 10 years ago. I'm not benefiting my health if diet and exercise constantly stresses me out, and I'm certainly not getting any younger or thinner worrying about getting older and fatter. Bottom line: I've got to find a balance and start living in the present.

That said, I spent January eating nourishing, natural foods MOST of the time and making small, healthy changes. I took my vitamins (sometimes), drank lots of water, and did PiYo 2x a week, but I wasn’t a slave to this routine and never felt restricted or guilty when “cheating.” My goal was to simply feel my best each day. Sometimes that meant treating myself to junk food, but that sluggish and uncomfortable feeling after eating a heavy, unhealthy meal reminded me it's not always worth it. I had to find a way to make my meals both satisfying AND healthy if I was going to stick to the plan, so I tried to get creative and make healthier alternatives to my favorite foods. I was pleasantly surprised with how easy, inexpensive, and delicious everything was!

When craving Mexican food, I let black beans, onions, garlic, and spices cook in a crockpot all day, made organic brown rice into Spanish rice with some salsa and chili lime Mrs. Dash, and cut up some avocados to top it off. The tostadas are processed, but the ingredients list contains only corn, vegetable oil, and salt. No preservatives, artificial colors, or mysterious ingredients in the entire meal, and my husband and I were happy to finish the leftovers the next night!

One night last weekend I had the phone out ready to place a pizza order, but I decided to see if I could improvise first. I put this together using flax seed pitas (Ezequial tortillas work great, too), pesto (on one), marinara (on the other), cheese, and fresh parsley, and I baked it for 8 minutes. Yum!

I also made these Thai summer rolls with rice paper, cabbage, lettuce, carrots, cucumber, basil, and mint. I could eat these every day, but I still need a little practice with rolling them up :).

I’ve also been drinking green lemonade (juice from romaine lettuce, kale, lemon, ginger, and two apples). It takes some getting used to, but I like the way it tastes and it contains tons of energizing and beneficial live enzymes that go to work instantly.

Eating this way, I had no need to feel guilty or deprived because everything was so nutritious and tasty! When I did go out to eat with friends or craved junk food, I allowed myself to indulge in whatever I wanted. I realized how unnecessary many of my negative feelings were, and in the end, I think I found some harmony between improving life and enjoying it. Even if I do what I can to live a long and healthy life, it will always be too short to skip dessert!